Our Bastille Day Cheese and Wine Tasting was a barrel of laughs.

Tasting different wines side by side was awesome. You taste a little of each and then go back for more until it’s all gone. The wines changed as we drank them and some that I didn’t like at the start were delicious at the end. I suspect a combination of booze and air affected the taste.

At our wine tasting, there were ten wine tasters and six bottles of red wine. There were three French wines in honour of Bastille Day, two Australian wines and one New Zealand wine. A good mix.

I asked each guest to bring either  cheese or a red wine that they hadn’t tried before, with a price limit of $20.

Loose lips and dutch rudders

Being the slightly crazy foodie that I am, everyone was encouraged to take notes on the wines based on some key points. Strong opinions and poetic license were held in high regard.

Our rating system from 0 to 10:

• 0 = yuck
• 5 = yeah-nah
• 10 = yum

The scores have been averaged out and presented at the end of each set of notes.

IMPORTANT: These tasting notes for entertainment only reflect the opinions of non-professional, inebriated wine drinkers. There was no spitting though there may have been some gargling, shit talking, wafting and sniffing. Please take with a grain of salt and glass of wine. Only a fool would form firm opinions on a wine based on this post.

Le Chat Noir Pinot Noir

2011, France

Looks like

• a fucking cat
• red stuff
• cute label

Smells like

• meth berries
• feet
• yummy berryicious lipgloss

Tastes like

• summer fields
• alcoholic strawberries
• berries, kittens and butterflies
• TVNZ bonuses (sux ballz)

Goes well with

• blowjobs and campervans
• Camembert
• BBQ

Yuck, yeah-nah or yum?

• 5.3 out of 10 yeah-nah (scores ranged from 2 to 10)

Baron d’Arignac Pays D’oc

Red country wine, 2011, France

Looks like

• pompous French bullshit
• Monsieur fancy pants

Smells like

• revolution

Tastes like

• bitter yet sweet – a culinary quandry
• serious
• a little savoury
• better with every sip

Goes well with

• a beef stew

Yuck, yeah-nah or yum?

• 8 out of 10 yum

Jackman Ridge Cabernet Merlot

Australia

Looks like

• the blood of Christ

Smells like

• WAZ

Tastes like

• Fruity tooti

Goes well with

• loose lips
• Jesus
• dutch rudders

Yuck, yeah-nah or yum?

• 7 out of 10 yum

Jacob’s Creek Cabernet Sauvignon

2010, Australia

Looks like

• your mum’s red wine
• dark like goth lipstick

Smells like

• purple
• a kiddie porn moustache

Tastes like

• awesome hairy balls
• Sweet as bro
• dry as a dishtowel

Goes well with

• rain
• unwanted advances

Yuck, yeah-nah or yum?

• 7 out of 10 yum

Paul Jaboulet Aîné Côtes du Rhône Parallèle 45

2009, France

Looks like

• blood from a broken heart
• a French cliché

Smells like

• pre-teen spirit
• better than it tastes

Tastes like

• Jay-Z and Kanye in Paris
• metallic
• blood
• very sweet

Goes well with

• no pants (like everything)

Yuck, yeah-nah or yum?

• 3.4 out of 10 yuck

Landscape Pinot Noir

2012, New Zealand

Looks like

• pinky
• quite light

Smells like

• wine

Tastes like

• a bit spongy,  dry
• bit of a kick
• slight rubber-bandy aftertaste

Yuck, yeah-nah or yum?

• 5 out of 10 yeah-nah

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